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How to get over a guy book

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A breakup can completely uproot everything we have planned for our life. It can screw up our long-term goals, leave our life feeling meaningless and without ambition and direction. Some of these are hyper breakup-specific, others are just damn good books for giving your life a sense of direction when you have none and nothing to go off of. I believe much of the pain of a breakup comes from having a life plan that you have fallen in love with. When it does not work out, you become angry that you now have to pursue a new life plan.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How to Get Over a Breakup - Ask Yourself This Question First Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Break Up Advice: How To Get Over A Guy You Never Actually Dated

20 Books That Will Help You Heal After a Breakup

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A friend recently asked me to recommend some books to help her friend get over a breakup. To both of our surprises, I couldn't give her any suggestions because, well, I didn't have any. I'm a clinical psychologist in full-time private practice in New York City. People often ask me to recommend shrinks, opine on new therapies, or to suggest appropriate books.

In this case, however, I didn't have one. All of my friends, colleagues, and patients know that one of the things I revere is failure. Failure, in any context, including not having a good book reference, or the dissolution of a romantic relationship provides you with an opportunity for improvement.

My failure to respond to my friend's request showed me that I had not done appropriate research in this area. I used this as an opportunity for learning and handed her this list a few weeks ago. Some of the titles I suggest will surprise you. Only three of the books I recommended to her and now to you are "how to get over a breakup" books. The other four contain life-altering wisdom or inspiration that can be even more useful than specific techniques to ex your ex.

Judging from the overwhelming response I got the last time I made a list of books for meaningful change, it seems that these reviews are helpful, which I hope is the case here. The Breakup Bible a novel by Melissa Kantor. The Breakup Bible is the best book I have found for helping people, especially girls, getting through their first heartbreak.

It is about a high school junior, Jen, whose boyfriend, Max, suddenly tells her that he wants to be friends.

Jen can't imagine how she will deal with seeing Max in school after they break up, let alone work with him on the school paper. Jen is initially skeptical about the advice contained in "The Breakup Bible" given to her by her grandmother, and yet the process Jen goes through throughout the novel book feels real, touching and, ultimately healing.

The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Three failed relationships in as many years are more likely to force you into awakening than three years on a desert island or shut away in your room. This book was also on my last list , and with good reason. The Power of Now is one of the books that has changed my life and speaks to me a spiritual level. In this book, spiritual leader Eckhart Tolle explains the often misunderstood concept of being in the now in a way that is useful and practical.

This is an essential concept for well-being and is particualtly helpful when your heart is in a dark place. Although they are both good, they are vastly different. Unlike the novel, this book is really aimed at adults and is an invaluable guide for helping people, especially women, move through Sussman's three phases of healing from a breakup: healing, understanding and transformation. What I like best about this book is that in addition to the thoughtful and empathic way that Sussman writes, there's lots of solid advice from women at each step of the process.

The Breakup Bible: The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce is particularly good for women emerging from a divorce, as it explains how the dissolution of a relationship makes you stronger.

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams. The Alchemist is not a breakup book. It is, a story of transformation that explains the need for a Personal Legend in all of our lives. The Alchemist tells the story of a shepherd boy who has a recurring dream, which he believes to be a prophecy and he sets out in search of a treasure.

Along they way, the boy meets a seer, an old king, an Englishman, an Arabian woman, and ultimately an Alchemist, who introduce the concept of a Personal Legend and teach him about destiny and following your own path in life. The reason I think that this is a great book to read when you have a wounded heart is that it helps to put life into perspective, and it opens your mind to the larger path of your life and learning.

The Alchemist is a timeless treasure, but it can be a particularly valuable treasure when you are feeling wounded. In spite of the fact that I have publicly admitted to being a romantic , when it comes down to the day-to-day workings of life, I am actually a pretty practical guy.

Bronson and Riley break down breakups in a practical, daily, easy-to-understand way that helps people process their emotions while also moving on in a positive way.

If you are a heartbroken practical person, this is definitely the book for you. This is my favorite no-nonsense break-up book. Elliott is supremely practical and behavioral in her approach to how to avoid getting sucked back into a dysfunctional relationship. Her "cold turkey" strategies are incredibly useful for people who need concrete advice on what to do next. I am aware that this will not go over well with many of my colleagues who want nothing to do with religion, but frankly I don't care.

Whether you are a religious person or not, or whether you choose to interpret it literally or metaphorically, The Bible is, was, and will forever be The Greatest Story Ever Told. The wisdom and parables contained in The Bible are the most helpful I have ever encountered in my life.

The Bible remains the best guide learning to have faith and that things do get better. If you are experiencing the pain of a breakup, I hope this list and the books on it are helpful to you.

Or if you know someone with a wounded heart, I hope that you share it with them. The wisdom contained in these various sources is vast and can help you or someone you know to a speedy recovery and a stronger and brighter future. Please feel free to leave a comment here about these books. If you have other suggestions, or feel like I missed a book or two, please let me know. I'm always up for learning more. Ben Michaelis is a clinical psychologist in full-time private practice in Manhattan.

Michaelis writes and speaks regularly about mental health, creativity, spirituality and motivation. He is the author of numerous popular and scholarly articles and is a regular contributor to The Huffington Post. News U. HuffPost Personal Video Horoscopes. Newsletters Coupons. Follow Us. Part of HuffPost Wellness. All rights reserved. Huffington Post. So, without further ado, here is my list of the seven best books for breakups:.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Suggest a correction. Ben Michaelis, Ph. Newsletter Sign Up. Successfully Subscribed!

How Do You Get Over Someone? 15 Books to Get You Through a Breakup With Your Dignity Intact

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However, how long that pain lingers is ultimately up to you, explains psychologist Guy Winch, whose book, How to Fix a Broken Heart , debunks some common myths surrounding heartbreak. This, Winch explains, is why we obsess over our ex partners to the point where we feel we crave them as if they were a drug we have been deprived of.

A friend recently asked me to recommend some books to help her friend get over a breakup. To both of our surprises, I couldn't give her any suggestions because, well, I didn't have any. I'm a clinical psychologist in full-time private practice in New York City. People often ask me to recommend shrinks, opine on new therapies, or to suggest appropriate books.

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Enter your mobile number or email address below and we'll send you a link to download the free Kindle App. Then you can start reading Kindle books on your smartphone, tablet, or computer - no Kindle device required. To get the free app, enter your mobile phone number. Would you like to tell us about a lower price? If you are a seller for this product, would you like to suggest updates through seller support? The writers of How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days are back to show you how to say 'Sayonara' with your head held high in this straightforward approach to getting out of a bad relationship and erasing Mr. Wrong from your life for good. Think you can't have revenge sex with his best friend, have a party celebrating your new singlehood or allow your friends to tell you what they really thought of him? Think again!

16 Breakup Books That Won’t Make You Feel Bad About Breaking Up

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C'mon, Tennyson. Is it really better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? Getting dumped or being the dumper is about the most universal experience one can have, but we all deal in different ways : some of us wallow, some of us rebound, some of us move mountains, some of us don't move at all. These 20 books to read after a breakup run the gamut of hurt.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: HOW TO GET OVER YOUR EX INSTANTLY - NO HOPE THEORY - BREAKUP PSYCHOLOGY

There's been a subtle shift noticeable on " theslumflower ," the Instagram page with over , followers operated by self-help author Chidera Eggerue. Before March 17, in addition to photos taken in home loungewear, Eggerue posted lots of snapshots of herself on city streets, sipping cocktails, and speaking to crowds. She wore a lot of bright lipstick paired with smoky eyeshadow and defined brows. Now, while self-isolated in her London apartment, Eggerue has kept posting pictures — there's one of her laughing in sunglasses on the floor, a black-and-white shot of her perched on a chair, and a photo of her on a plush red lounge chair. But she's not wearing makeup anymore.

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A harsh reality to face up to at times, but needless to say, they become fixated. If right now you find yourself in similar circumstances, I want to provide a remedy…. Having choice with men. You need to know that there are options out there other than this one guy. The only way to do this, and to get over this fixation, is to go out and create more options for yourself. The more fixated you are, the more choices you need — the more you need to go out, meet new people, and break out of your comfort zone.

Getting over someone you loved and then lost is more about the way you see The truth is, most books out on the topic give pretty shitty, vague advice that isn't.

Personally, my taste in breakup books is very particular. As time went on, my scope widened a bit, but the best breakup books , in my opinion, all have this in common: They allow you to escape, but not in a mindless way. The book starts with a breakup, and while there is an erotic romantic plot with her merman rebound just go with it , this book is definitely anything but saccharine. They seemed to be saying, Look, someone wants me this much.

The 7 Best Books for Getting Over a Breakup

Whether you're just going through some shit or are fresh off a breakup, there's nothing like deep diving into some books that can heal you and remind you of your self-worth. Here, nine women share the sanity-saving books that got them over a serious bout of heartache that you should consider reading, too. There was a chapter where Hooks talks about how love only happens when you truly open yourself up to it.

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